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“I Suffer From Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning.

Turnaround

Depression

Is My Anxiety Because I Am Still Unpacking from Africa?

January 28, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Is my anxiety from not cleaning up completely from my trip to Africa?

It’s the age-old dilemma, which came first? Am I feeling anxiety and unsettled because I am still unpacking, cleaning, and putting away my climbing clothing and gear from my trip to Africa? Or is it the baskets of washed clothes, my boots, and my down jacket still clogging up the laundry room that make me feel large amounts of anxiety? Either way, things in my home office … [Read more...] about Is My Anxiety Because I Am Still Unpacking from Africa?

Am I Able to Be Happier, to Feel Joy?

January 24, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

I wish I could say yes to joy, to being happier. There are many emotions I am familiar with, but joy and happiness are rarely one of them. OK is the operative word. If someone asks how I am doing, I stretch the truth and say that I am “darn glad to be here.” Now while that isn’t a lie, it is often far from my real expectations. I am familiar with the change triangle and … [Read more...] about Am I Able to Be Happier, to Feel Joy?

What Made Depression Almost Keep Me From Summiting Mt. Kilimanjaro?

January 21, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Depression almost kept me from summiting mount Kilimanjaro with unhelpful, all or nothing thinking

We reached the summit in seven days, but day four almost ended my attempt. How did I think the entire trip would be rain free? What caused me to optimistically think that there would be no rain and the climb would be all monkeys and giraffes in the wild? I had looked at long-range forecasts for Tanzania, and Africa before leaving America. The website even had forecasts based … [Read more...] about What Made Depression Almost Keep Me From Summiting Mt. Kilimanjaro?

3 Years and 9 Months After Admitting Depression, I Can Say Merry Christmas

December 25, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash Seeking help in April 2019 was one of the hardest things I have ever done. And yet, had I not picked choice number three that morning, I might not be writing this. As I said before that morning, I saw only three choices: End it allKeep doing the same things I had been doing and keep expecting a different resultSeek Professional medical … [Read more...] about 3 Years and 9 Months After Admitting Depression, I Can Say Merry Christmas

What I Learned Having Skin Cancer Removed from My Face

December 19, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

what I have learned about depression when basal skim cancer was removed from my face

Photo by National Cancer Institute on Unsplash The first thing I learned is you cannot hide the results of skin cancer removal. For the first 48 hours, I had a huge bandage on my face that covered the surgical crater left from Moh’s surgery. I had instructions, not to bathe or get the bandage wet in any way. The nurse covered to an area with petroleum jelly and covered … [Read more...] about What I Learned Having Skin Cancer Removed from My Face

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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Depression almost kept me from summiting mount Kilimanjaro with unhelpful, all or nothing thinking

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  • Is My Anxiety Because I Am Still Unpacking from Africa?
  • Am I Able to Be Happier, to Feel Joy?
  • What Made Depression Almost Keep Me From Summiting Mt. Kilimanjaro?
  • 3 Years and 9 Months After Admitting Depression, I Can Say Merry Christmas
  • What I Learned Having Skin Cancer Removed from My Face

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