Unsplash2025 has got to be better than 2024Last year, I lost my Mother, and my wife lost her father. Even though both were in their 90s, the finality of it is still hard to comprehend. And my adult children lost the two grandparents that they had grown up with.The full year was just a mess.Even knowing my mother was 96, going on 97 was no conciliation. In the last weeks of … [Read more...] about It’s A New Year; Am I Ready?
Change Triangle
What Makes Me Choose to Live with Depression?
Photo by Marten Bjork on UnsplashChoosing not to live with depression is, for me, choosing suicide.Because of my family history, I see that I either learn to face depression and live with it, or check out. And my one instance of contemplating checking out occurred almost 50 years ago. Since then, I have understood that I am more afraid of death than I am of living with … [Read more...] about What Makes Me Choose to Live with Depression?
Summers Here, So Where Is My Depression?
Photo by David Vives on Unsplash I’m still stuck on being alone for the summer, with my depression on vacation.After being so determined to get my depression out in the open, why am I sad that it has taken a holiday? I should be doing back flips and alerting the media. Depression’s absence should be a celebration. I have been working on this for 5 years.And yet, I miss the … [Read more...] about Summers Here, So Where Is My Depression?
Why Depression Is My Lifelong Companion
Photo by Florian Klauer on UnsplashDepression has been with me my entire life. I am drafting the story of my life facing depression head on; after only 62 years of ignoring it, of never calling it by name, hiding it from everyone including myself, and sweeping the crumbs of every episode under the rug each time it was over, as I walked away never looking back.If I had … [Read more...] about Why Depression Is My Lifelong Companion
Joy Has Been Elusive for Years, But I May Have Found It Again
Photo by Tim Mossholder on UnsplashJoy is one emotion that has been missing over the past 4 or 5 years.Not days, or weeks, but years. That’s a long time. 365 days times 4 years equals 1,465 days. Five years is that plus 365. And for much of that time, I did not even know I was not experiencing joy. I was happy if I experienced any emotion.And yes, that included the emotion of … [Read more...] about Joy Has Been Elusive for Years, But I May Have Found It Again