Photo by Hello I'm Nik on Unsplash I have been depressed, with high-functioning (concealed) depression for over 50 years. It wasn’t until I spent 4 days in 5 East that I faced my depression. Until then, I had gotten through each episode and never looked back. There was no critique, no sense that I should do something different. It was over so let’s just move on and … [Read more...] about Depressed? Why I Hadn’t Considered Myself as Having Depression
Unhelpful thinking
If Only I Felt Happy, Maybe I Could Be Happy
Or do I need to “fake it until I make it?” I know all about attitude and how it is the only thing I have control over. But taking that information and turning it into reality is not the same thing. So how do I turn my desire for the feeling of joy, of happiness, into a reality? Over the centuries, many famous, well-known people, have used this technique to keep a positive … [Read more...] about If Only I Felt Happy, Maybe I Could Be Happy
Am I Able to Be Happier, to Feel Joy?
I wish I could say yes to joy, to being happier. There are many emotions I am familiar with, but joy and happiness are rarely one of them. OK is the operative word. If someone asks how I am doing, I stretch the truth and say that I am “darn glad to be here.” Now while that isn’t a lie, it is often far from my real expectations. I am familiar with the change triangle and … [Read more...] about Am I Able to Be Happier, to Feel Joy?
What Made Depression Almost Keep Me From Summiting Mt. Kilimanjaro?
We reached the summit in seven days, but day four almost ended my attempt. How did I think the entire trip would be rain free? What caused me to optimistically think that there would be no rain and the climb would be all monkeys and giraffes in the wild? I had looked at long-range forecasts for Tanzania, and Africa before leaving America. The website even had forecasts based … [Read more...] about What Made Depression Almost Keep Me From Summiting Mt. Kilimanjaro?
3 Years and 9 Months After Admitting Depression, I Can Say Merry Christmas
Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash Seeking help in April 2019 was one of the hardest things I have ever done. And yet, had I not picked choice number three that morning, I might not be writing this. As I said before that morning, I saw only three choices: End it allKeep doing the same things I had been doing and keep expecting a different resultSeek Professional medical … [Read more...] about 3 Years and 9 Months After Admitting Depression, I Can Say Merry Christmas