Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash Joy is one emotion that has been missing over the past 4 or 5 years. Not days, or weeks, but years. That’s a long time. 365 days times 4 years equals 1,465 days. Five years is that plus 365. And for much of that time, I did not even know I was not experiencing joy. I was happy if I experienced any emotion. And yes, that included the … [Read more...] about Joy Has Been Elusive for Years, But I May Have Found It Again
Guilt and Shame
Photo by Christina Victoria Craft on Unsplash 30 days ago, she added 15 mg. of mirtazapine to the 450 mg of Wellbutrin XL that I take each morning. The addition of this drug is prescribed to help me go from ok, to a balanced life where I might feel joy again. I have written much recently about how I have gotten to the ok stage but cannot seem to move into what I remember … [Read more...] about I See My Psychiatrist Tomorrow to Discuss the 15mg of Mirtazapine She Added
I tell myself I am better than most because I do not spend hours each day watching viral cat videos. Yes, I’m the guy who is always busy. There is always a project to plan, start, or finish. I am busy at work and busy at home. I always have a list. Mostly my list is written. Many times, the list is on the back of an envelope or an old receipt that I found on my dresser. At … [Read more...] about Why Am I So Busy Doing Everything Except …?
Photo by Dariusz Sankowski on Unsplash How do I know that the next page is a new chapter? Mostly because I am writing this chapter. And I have written every chapter of my life so far. However, many, if not every, chapter has its share of ghostwriters. And for the awards ceremony, depression is nominated for a supporting role. Had I not been genetically pre-disposed to … [Read more...] about This Is the Beginning of The Next Chapter in My Life with Depression
Photo by Dan Cook on Unsplash And I am not laughing about not laughing. I just read an article that listed 16 Things People Don't Realize You Are Doing Because You Are Emotionally Numb. And of those 16, 3 jumped out to me as things I am doing a lot. Well, I have been doing them a lot lately. And these issues appear to have their roots in my depression. Click below to … [Read more...] about I Don’t Laugh Out Loud Anymore Because of My Depression