Or do I need to “fake it until I make it?” I know all about attitude and how it is the only thing I have control over. But taking that information and turning it into reality is not the same thing. So how do I turn my desire for the feeling of joy, of happiness, into a reality? Over the centuries, many famous, well-known people, have used this technique to keep a positive … [Read more...] about If Only I Felt Happy, Maybe I Could Be Happy
I wish I could say yes to joy, to being happier. There are many emotions I am familiar with, but joy and happiness are rarely one of them. OK is the operative word. If someone asks how I am doing, I stretch the truth and say that I am “darn glad to be here.” Now while that isn’t a lie, it is often far from my real expectations. I am familiar with the change triangle and … [Read more...] about Am I Able to Be Happier, to Feel Joy?
I have experienced all of the other emotions over the past 40 months. Having been introduced to the change triangle by a therapist. I now refer to it, but I don’t always think about it, even when it would be most helpful. Anyway, here it is again in case you haven’t seen it in my earlier blog posts. I have spent a lot of time in sadness. We are on a first-name basis. … [Read more...] about Where Has My Emotion Of Joy Gone?
Why? I’m still not sure what to say to my new Psychiatrist. And the appointment is less than five hours away. Yes, I have made some notes and collected documents. I have my Aetna Insurance card and my drivers license. In the bathroom, I hung a large cloth bag to collect all my current prescription medication, plus the supplements I am taking. Once again, I have all the … [Read more...] about I’m a Little Nervous This Morning
How could he even say that? That I am blaming my depression for my actions. That I am making excuses for my actions and not being responsible. That’s not even close to what I am thinking. I am a mess today. My therapy session has opened all kinds of feelings, emotions, and who the hell knows what else. And worse, I see the next session as an extension of today. More … [Read more...] about What do you mean I’m blaming others?