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“I Suffer From Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning.

Turnaround

depression and anxiety

Is My Anxiety Because I Am Still Unpacking from Africa?

January 28, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Is my anxiety from not cleaning up completely from my trip to Africa?

It’s the age-old dilemma, which came first? Am I feeling anxiety and unsettled because I am still unpacking, cleaning, and putting away my climbing clothing and gear from my trip to Africa? Or is it the baskets of washed clothes, my boots, and my down jacket still clogging up the laundry room that make me feel large amounts of anxiety? Either way, things in my home office … [Read more...] about Is My Anxiety Because I Am Still Unpacking from Africa?

What Made Depression Almost Keep Me From Summiting Mt. Kilimanjaro?

January 21, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Depression almost kept me from summiting mount Kilimanjaro with unhelpful, all or nothing thinking

We reached the summit in seven days, but day four almost ended my attempt. How did I think the entire trip would be rain free? What caused me to optimistically think that there would be no rain and the climb would be all monkeys and giraffes in the wild? I had looked at long-range forecasts for Tanzania, and Africa before leaving America. The website even had forecasts based … [Read more...] about What Made Depression Almost Keep Me From Summiting Mt. Kilimanjaro?

What I Learned Having Skin Cancer Removed from My Face

December 19, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

what I have learned about depression when basal skim cancer was removed from my face

Photo by National Cancer Institute on Unsplash The first thing I learned is you cannot hide the results of skin cancer removal. For the first 48 hours, I had a huge bandage on my face that covered the surgical crater left from Moh’s surgery. I had instructions, not to bathe or get the bandage wet in any way. The nurse covered to an area with petroleum jelly and covered … [Read more...] about What I Learned Having Skin Cancer Removed from My Face

Why Can’t I Get Joy into My Head?

December 9, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

It’s seems such an easy thing, for everyone has an idea of what their own joy looks like. So why is it I cannot feel the emotion? Instead, I play defense and do anything I can to avoid joy. Joy is a risk. And suddenly I cannot figure out a way to take a risk. I’ve got depression on the run, or at least sitting in the back row. Why chance depression’s return by taking a … [Read more...] about Why Can’t I Get Joy into My Head?

What Makes Self-Care Keep Evolving?

November 9, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

why self-care is changing my depression

Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash It still amazes me that I am allowed to take care of myself. The whole idea of putting on one’s own oxygen mask before helping others has been foreign to me. Or should I say that in the past it has been foreign. Recently, I have made a concerted effort to include my own needs in my plans. This can be seen in my attitude towards things I … [Read more...] about What Makes Self-Care Keep Evolving?

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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  • Depressed? Why I Hadn’t Considered Myself as Having Depression
  • If Only I Felt Happy, Maybe I Could Be Happy
  • Is My Anxiety Because I Am Still Unpacking from Africa?
  • Am I Able to Be Happier, to Feel Joy?
  • What Made Depression Almost Keep Me From Summiting Mt. Kilimanjaro?

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