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“I Suffer From Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning.

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high functioning depression

Depression Never Told Me It’s Not All About Me

June 15, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Depression never told me that it's not all about me, it would rather I feel not in control and helpless than give me choices.

It turns out that I am not the center of everyone’s universe. I’ve seen others exhibit this behavior and I most certainly do it. Many times, I have gone through things that were traumatic and painful. Coming out on the other side of these incidents, I can see how it impacted others too. It turns out it wasn't just me and what happened to me. This is especially true with my … [Read more...] about Depression Never Told Me It’s Not All About Me

Why Can’t I Pick Strawberries With My High-Functioning Depression?

June 4, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

With my high-functioning depression I am not motivated to pick the ripe strawberries in my garden

I know they are ripe; I can see them through the chicken wire protection I built. Yet I am not motivated at all to pick them. I picked a few when they first started to ripen. I had some on my Honey Nut Cheerios. And they were tasty, having just come out of the garden. Now some of the larger strawberries are ripe. Yet here I sit at 6:47 AM writing, instead of picking … [Read more...] about Why Can’t I Pick Strawberries With My High-Functioning Depression?

If I Did Not Have Depression, Would I Have Already Written 500 Blog Posts About My Depression? (This is only post #489)

May 15, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

If I did not have depression, I would have already written my 500th blog post about depression

Getting stuck in my depression happens a lot. Things on the surface appear to be going well, but underneath the surface, there is a mish-mosh of stuff going on.  Oh, the miracle of concealed, high-functioning depression. Of course, the easy way out is to blame my lack of forward momentum on my depression. I can say “If I didn’t have depression, then I would …” But this … [Read more...] about If I Did Not Have Depression, Would I Have Already Written 500 Blog Posts About My Depression? (This is only post #489)

What Makes You Think I Would Choose Concealed Depression?

February 14, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

What makes you think I would chose concealed depression as the way I want to live my life? I want to be stronger than that.

Stigma is the first thing that comes to mind. Second, I am always surprised when I learn someone else has the same concerns about sharing their concealed whatever. And seeing Jill's admission that she sometimes opened up to a boss leads me to believe she is one of the bravest people I have ever read about. I am not at all comfortable about sharing my high-functioning … [Read more...] about What Makes You Think I Would Choose Concealed Depression?

Once Again It’s Bye to Prozac & Hello to More Wellbutrin

December 5, 2021 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

switching away from prozac to a higher dose of Wellbutrin XL is a way to help me get out of bed without depression getting involved

I can’t believe I did not remember how Prozac made me sluggish and dull in the mornings. Two months ago, I was almost 90% successful at leading a balanced life with depression. This was a huge achievement for me. The past 2 ½ years had not all been like that. In fact, much of it was at 50%, 40%, or even 7% in terms of balance in my life. And the depression that finally … [Read more...] about Once Again It’s Bye to Prozac & Hello to More Wellbutrin

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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  • I Feel So Guilty for Not Doing More Today
  • I Took a Self-Care Day and I Don’t Feel Guilty
  • I’m Gaining Weight – Can I Blame My Depression?
  • My Depression Has Me Catastrophizing Instead of Fixing My Sleep Problem
  • Why Am I Having Trouble Getting Out of Bed Again?

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