It’s that gnawing feeling in the pit of my stomach. The feeling that should stop when the event is over. But mine hasn’t gotten the message. A trigger comes and goes. I know I should feel anxious when the event is taking place. But after it, I should be able to relax. And that is just not happening. This morning, we returned the rental car. Because we arrived right at … [Read more...] about Is Anxiety the Reason I Can’t Let This Go?
I Meet My New Psychiatrist Next Week
Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash Next Wednesday, before I go to work, I have an appointment with my new medicine management psychiatrist. I am not nervous about the visit, but I am curious. It is a teaching hospital. So every year, I see a new psychiatrist. And about the time we are finally making progress, they move on, and I get a new psychiatrist. Thus, the learning … [Read more...] about I Meet My New Psychiatrist Next Week
I Discovered My Life with Depression is Not a Lie
Image by Clker-Free-Vector-Images from Pixabay It’s funny the stories we tell ourselves. “Fake it until you make it” has always been my motto. And I have always felt that there is more for me to do before I can say I have made it. As the head psychiatrist on 5 East asked me, “when is enough, enough?” Getting one more certification, one more set of initials after my name, … [Read more...] about I Discovered My Life with Depression is Not a Lie
Why Can’t I Do Everything with My Depression Being Quiet?
If each day was longer, I could get my entire to-do list done. And if I was more organized, I could achieve all my daily goals. At work, I still create a weekly checklist. Looking at it each day reminds me to check on certain procedures and policies. I built much white space with lines to write in things that pop up during each day at work. Often there is a list of things to … [Read more...] about Why Can’t I Do Everything with My Depression Being Quiet?
Did Depression Make Me Forget?
Photo by Towfiqu barbhuiya on Unsplash Last night, it seemed like a logical question to ask. I began to ponder it and play out the ramifications in my head. There must have been a reason why I did not write it down. I try to save ideas such as what inspired me so I can ponder them later. I'm like a cow grazing the grass, then later chewing its cud. Why didn’t I write … [Read more...] about Did Depression Make Me Forget?