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“I Suffer From Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning.

End Child Anxiety

stress and anxiety

Is My Anxiety Because I Am Still Unpacking from Africa?

January 28, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Is my anxiety from not cleaning up completely from my trip to Africa?

It’s the age-old dilemma, which came first? Am I feeling anxiety and unsettled because I am still unpacking, cleaning, and putting away my climbing clothing and gear from my trip to Africa? Or is it the baskets of washed clothes, my boots, and my down jacket still clogging up the laundry room that make me feel large amounts of anxiety? Either way, things in my home office … [Read more...] about Is My Anxiety Because I Am Still Unpacking from Africa?

Is Anxiety the Reason I Can’t Let This Go?

November 2, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Is my anxiety the reason I cannot let this go or is my attitude preventing me from changing anxiety into something useful?

It’s that gnawing feeling in the pit of my stomach. The feeling that should stop when the event is over. But mine hasn’t gotten the message. A trigger comes and goes. I know I should feel anxious when the event is taking place. But after it, I should be able to relax. And that is just not happening. This morning, we returned the rental car. Because we arrived right at … [Read more...] about Is Anxiety the Reason I Can’t Let This Go?

Is There Just Too Much Going On?

January 18, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

I feel so stressed but was trying to conceal it so people wouldn't see depresion was sharing unhelpful thinking

Last night one of my employees said I looked stressed. I certainly wasn't trying to project feeling that way. However, the look on my face must have given away what I have been trying to hide. Like my concealed depression, I have not shared my feelings at work. Well, almost never. And I was less than excited about the one or two times I attempted it. Sharing at work not … [Read more...] about Is There Just Too Much Going On?

Why Am I Anxious About Being Anxious?

January 13, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

I am anxious about my anxiety

It’s like a huge weight I am dragging around. If I don’t think about it, it’s still there. But if I start thinking about it, the weight just intensifies. Much of my frustration about the morning is centered around the painfully slow response of my laptop. It has taken me over 10 minutes to pen these few sentences. Should I purchase a new laptop or continue to seek out … [Read more...] about Why Am I Anxious About Being Anxious?

Will I Be Less Anxious Today?

September 10, 2021 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Do I really have anxiety and is it obsessive?

Trying to measure my anxiety may make me anxious. Understanding how I am feeling today is not a bad thing. Then looking at the answer compared to how I was feeling five days ago can be helpful. I can judge by this quick exercise whether the new medicine is working. This morning, I am leaning towards “less anxious.” Now I still have a list of things to do today. I have … [Read more...] about Will I Be Less Anxious Today?

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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  • I Took a Self-Care Day and I Don’t Feel Guilty
  • I’m Gaining Weight – Can I Blame My Depression?
  • My Depression Has Me Catastrophizing Instead of Fixing My Sleep Problem
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