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“I Suffer From Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning.

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Why Can’t I Just Make It Easy And Stop Facing My Depression?

March 12, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Why can't I just stop facing my depression? It was so much easier when I wasn't doing all the work to face my depression

Facing my depression, and saying it's name out loud, has been work. Sometimes the work has been exhausting. It has only been easy on rare occasions. Most of the time some effort is required on my part to call out depression’s antics and to work through an alternative that doesn’t involve unhelpful thinking. Yet in the past, time travel worked. I was able to ruminate … [Read more...] about Why Can’t I Just Make It Easy And Stop Facing My Depression?

Can I Tell You the Truth?

November 5, 2019 by Depression Is Not My Boss 3 Comments

I feel shame and guilt when I dont feel like writing about depression

Today, I don’t feel like writing. However, I feel I need to write. This is how I am working out my relationship with depression. Through these blog posts, I am creating a balanced life for myself. So, on a day where I do not feel like writing, I also feel guilt. Why shouldn’t I just suck it up and write? After all, that is what I said I was going to do. My plan has … [Read more...] about Can I Tell You the Truth?

You Will Never Guess the New Name I Learned For My Depression.

September 4, 2019 by Depression Is Not My Boss 1 Comment

Keeping depression out in the open requires constant attention. Ignoring it, or worse, assuming I am “over it,” has dire consequences. As I learn to live with depression, I am learning more and more about how it works. I am learning how secretive it wants to be, and how tempting it can be to follow its ideas. Understanding this has helped me see that depression isn’t only … [Read more...] about You Will Never Guess the New Name I Learned For My Depression.

Why didn’t I know it’s a compass for living?

September 3, 2019 by Depression Is Not My Boss 1 Comment

It’s easy to blame others. It’s easy for me to be defensive when someone I love questions my answer. My mind is often three to five steps ahead before the person even gets the entire sentence out of their mouth. I am time traveling and living in the future. It is a competition to get to the correct answer first. I have already mentioned many times that I am … [Read more...] about Why didn’t I know it’s a compass for living?

I’m ashamed I have depression. Then I discovered 10 reasons it’s not my fault.

July 11, 2019 by Depression Is Not My Boss 2 Comments

Ten reasons depression is not my fault

"Just suck it up, grow a pair, stop acting like a girl." These are all things I have heard hurled at myself and other guys as I was growing up. Society set certain expectations for men and women at the end of the 20th century. My formative years centered around Woodstock, Kent State, and the Vietnam War. It was also influenced by “Father Knows Best” on TV, along with Laugh-in, … [Read more...] about I’m ashamed I have depression. Then I discovered 10 reasons it’s not my fault.

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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  • I Feel So Guilty for Not Doing More Today
  • I Took a Self-Care Day and I Don’t Feel Guilty
  • I’m Gaining Weight – Can I Blame My Depression?
  • My Depression Has Me Catastrophizing Instead of Fixing My Sleep Problem
  • Why Am I Having Trouble Getting Out of Bed Again?

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