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End Child Anxiety

“I Live With Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning About It.

On Our Own, C'Ville

My Depression and I Are About to Celebrate Our 4th Anniversary

April 4, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Depression and I are celebrating our 4th anniversary even though we have ben together for over 60 years, but I never faced my depression until 4 years ago

Photo by Joy Memon on Unsplash Depression and I go back almost 60 years, but I have only said “I have depression” for the past four. Before that, I was all about getting the episode over so I could get back to my “regular life.” It never occurred to me that living with depression was my regular life. I was so focused on never having depression that I refused to see my … [Read more...] about My Depression and I Are About to Celebrate Our 4th Anniversary

Why Must My Depression Decide What I Really Want or Need?

March 13, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Depression can keep me from my wellness recovery action plan and other tools like the change triangle

Photo by Alvaro Reyes on Unsplash If I think I want or need something, shouldn’t that be enough? Yet here I am negotiating with myself over what I want. Even after a lifetime of making my own choices, I am stuck between my ideas and depression. Now it is possible that my depression has allowed me a few “wins.” You know, just enough to keep me in the game. My … [Read more...] about Why Must My Depression Decide What I Really Want or Need?

What’s Stopping Me from Telling the World I Have Depression?

February 27, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Depression and stigma about depression

In my mind, I should have said “I have depression” years ago. And while I have done so in this blog, I have shied away from a formal announcement. One would think that after 530 blog posts, my secret would be out. But the fact that it hasn’t has more to do with “it’s not always about you,” than about my relationship with depression. There are many groups to which I have … [Read more...] about What’s Stopping Me from Telling the World I Have Depression?

Will Depression Return if I Retire Again?

February 8, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

will depression return if I retire

Depression helped me retire the first time, making a cluster of the entire experience. My depression convinced me to scrap over 40 years of planning and jump into retirement with only a sketchy idea of what I was going to do. Now the upside was I finally had off on Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s. We flew north for an entire week around Thanksgiving. But the nuts … [Read more...] about Will Depression Return if I Retire Again?

Why Won’t Depression Let Professional Help In?

July 20, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Depression is not letting professional help stay in my life, or is my depression making me push away professional help?

Photo by Nico Smit on Unsplash My depression has exclusivity in my life. Try as I might to invite others in to share my life, in the end, I find ways to stay distant. Even when I initiate the friendship or professional relationship, in the end, I find ways to stay distant from them. And even when I stay involved, my depression is still working to keep me separate from … [Read more...] about Why Won’t Depression Let Professional Help In?

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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