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“I Suffer From Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning.

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Depression is Not My Fault, But What About Where My Decisions Lead Me?

August 24, 2021 by Depression Is Not My Boss 2 Comments

Having depression is not my fault, but what about the decisions I make and the paths these decisions take me on?

Daily I repeat to myself, “I have depression, depression does not have me.” And I have been fortunate to have help reinforcing that idea. From medicine management, WRAP, SMART Recovery, the Change Triangle, and more, I have tools. And I have peer support. All of this has helped me gain a clearer perspective on depression and how it has altered the trajectory of my … [Read more...] about Depression is Not My Fault, But What About Where My Decisions Lead Me?

Unhelpful Thinking Says There’s No Time, Not Even For Self-care

August 20, 2021 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Depression and unhelpful thinking styles are keeping me too busy for self-care

The recycling must be taken for pick up tomorrow and the trash must go to the landfill. There is no publicly funded trash or recycling pick-up in the rural community we live in. If you want trash pickup at your home, you must pay a company to come and get it. Cardboard and aluminum cans can still be recycled at the landfill. Plastics, glass, and everything else is no longer … [Read more...] about Unhelpful Thinking Says There’s No Time, Not Even For Self-care

Is My Life With Depression Really in Balance?

August 13, 2021 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Al I Leading A Balanced Life with Depression?

That calm, clear feeling arrived two days ago. Even having the oven stop working after I used the auto-clean feature hasn’t dulled my sense of “I’m Ok.” I am enjoying this feeling. Understanding that this will not last forever, I am soaking it in. And the sense of balance is still with me today, as I start day three. Having balance does not make me feel special. I am not … [Read more...] about Is My Life With Depression Really in Balance?

My Depression Is Better, But Where Is Happy?

July 24, 2021 by Depression Is Not My Boss 1 Comment

I am OK, my depression is at bay, so why am I not happy?

When asked how I am doing, I can once again say “I’m doing good.” I know this because I am making plans again. When I was circling the drain, I could not envision a future. Heck, I was having trouble seeing the edge of the drain. And feeling up against the wall made it almost impossible to see or feel anything. Making it through the day was often the high point. When I am … [Read more...] about My Depression Is Better, But Where Is Happy?

Looking Back at My Past; In What Ways Have I Changed?

February 18, 2021 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

How Have I Changed After Being Diagnosed With MDD; Has My Mental Health Awareness Changed?

This question is something I have been thinking about for a while. It has been 22 months since I went to the hospital and was diagnosed with MDD, major depressive disorder. And my journey towards recovery and a balanced life has not been a straight line upward. I have experienced setbacks and hiccups along the way. Yet, here I am today, a much stronger version of … [Read more...] about Looking Back at My Past; In What Ways Have I Changed?

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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  • I Feel So Guilty for Not Doing More Today
  • I Took a Self-Care Day and I Don’t Feel Guilty
  • I’m Gaining Weight – Can I Blame My Depression?
  • My Depression Has Me Catastrophizing Instead of Fixing My Sleep Problem
  • Why Am I Having Trouble Getting Out of Bed Again?

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