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“I Suffer From Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning.

End Child Anxiety

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Two Days in A Row, Am I Dreaming?

June 27, 2020 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Wellbutrin XL allows me to wake up and get up with depression

Once again, I woke up and I got up. No drama, no negotiating with myself about whether to get up or stay in bed a little longer. You don’t know how relieved I am to skip the anxiety and worry about something as simple as getting out of bed. Lately, I can either roll over and grab a few more winks or get up. Now, the bartering and indecision are gone. READ: I just want to … [Read more...] about Two Days in A Row, Am I Dreaming?

What Was I Worried About? My New Psychiatrist Understands Me

June 12, 2020 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

My new PSychiatrist hears ma and is changing my medication

Having written about this visit twice before it happened, I guess I was a little concerned about the outcome. But the discussion went very well. As you will see, we made some changes to my medication. But this was after almost an hour of conversation from a socially distant distance, with each of us wearing masks. I was able to share my list which I wrote into a blog post … [Read more...] about What Was I Worried About? My New Psychiatrist Understands Me

Day Five of My Stay-cation, So Why Can’t I Sleep?

June 10, 2020 by Depression Is Not My Boss 1 Comment

My Staycation has been disrupted by not sleeping

On the first day of vacation, I was in bed and out like a light. This makes sense as I was up early and had worked until midnight. Then I had the hour-plus ride home, and some relaxing with a word game then lights out. For the past two nights, I have been going to bed later and later. This seemed like a marvelous thing to do. I was not rushing to bed as quickly as I … [Read more...] about Day Five of My Stay-cation, So Why Can’t I Sleep?

Will I be Ready for My New Psychiatrist?

June 8, 2020 by Depression Is Not My Boss 2 Comments

Depression wants me to hide my major depressive disorder from my new Psychiatrist

I promise to tell my new Doctor the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Going into my doctor’s office and putting on my concealed depression face results in me not getting the true help I need. Depression is once again getting me to be secretive. It reminds me that no one understands me as well as it does, and I should be wary of anyone (or any medicine) that … [Read more...] about Will I be Ready for My New Psychiatrist?

I Asked My Doctor 6 Questions About My MDD Symptoms

May 14, 2020 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

6 questions to ask your doctor if your MDD symptoms aren't improving

What he told me was life changing. Getting out of bed each morning has been drama. Most days, I launch an internal dialogue with myself, which ends in my feeling guilty about staying in bed. Then at some point, a sound triggers my “fight or flight” response, and I leap out of bed. This scenario of guilt and shame for not being able to get out of bed has been going on for … [Read more...] about I Asked My Doctor 6 Questions About My MDD Symptoms

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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  • I Feel So Guilty for Not Doing More Today
  • I Took a Self-Care Day and I Don’t Feel Guilty
  • I’m Gaining Weight – Can I Blame My Depression?
  • My Depression Has Me Catastrophizing Instead of Fixing My Sleep Problem
  • Why Am I Having Trouble Getting Out of Bed Again?

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