Why am I sleepless again?

This whole sleeping thing has kept me up at night.

It’s not clear exactly when my sleep became disrupted, but I am nowhere near close to getting a full night’s sleep. And it has been almost a year.

The night goes something like this:

• 10 PM – head to bed and play a few games of solitaire on my I-pad.
• 10:15 – 10:45 close laptop. Lights are already off.
• Fall asleep fairly soon after this.
• 2 AM – wake up, turn over and try to get back to sleep
• 3 AM – wake up, turn over and try to get back to sleep
• 4 AM – wake up, turn over and try to get back to sleep
• 5 AM – wake up, turn over, and try to get back to sleep
• 6 AM – 6:30 AM – wake up, turn over and decide if I’m going to try and go back to sleep
• 6:30 AM – 7:30 AM – Drag myself out of bed with the promise of a pot of coffee.

This ritual has played out for months. I have tried Melatonin. But not every night, week after week. I did use it consistently for maybe a week, but the side effect was edginess. Now, this is not mentioned anywhere in the literature about a natural sleep aid. But that has been my experience more times than not.

I’m reluctant to continue using Melatonin.

With my follow-up visit with a Psychiatrist this week, she said that she could prescribe an actual sleeping pill. But she was reluctant to add additional medications unless I felt I really needed it. I was glad that she put it that way. I would rather figure this out without another drug.

We agreed that exercise might be the extra thing I needed to resume a more normal sleeping pattern. I had stopped going to the gym when in the hospital and have only been back once since then. I do miss it and feel this would be the next step in my road to recovery.

I will be back at the gym this weekend.

I was going four to five times a week. I would spend 30 to 45 minutes on the elliptical or the treadmill, getting my heart rate up. Then I would do core training, for balance, and some weightlifting. My gym days began over 8 years ago. That’s something I am proud of.

Will this help me sleep through the night?

I sure hope so. Something needs to work. It used to be I would almost leap out of bed in the morning, wondering what the day was going to bring. Now I play mind games and psych myself up to get out of bed. There is no leaping, no excitement, just motion. Better sleep is part of my long-term plan.

Have something that works for you? Please leave a comment.