Somehow, Day Three doesn’t seem as calm and quiet as I expected. But as I sit with it now, I can see that today was calmer—definitely calmer than Day Two. I didn’t feel the need to write a 17-item to-do list, and I didn’t wake up with that sense of urgency that I used to carry like a backpack full of rocks. I actually had less on my plate today, and that alone felt like a … [Read more...] about Retirement: What Day Three Really Looks Like (Hint: Not What I Planned)
Self Care
What High-Functioning (Concealed) Depression Really Looks Like
If you saw me back then, you’d never guess I was struggling. Or so I thought, anyway, that was my plan.I got up every morning, went to work, paid my bills, smiled at people, and said, “I’m fine.” I showed up for everyone else, even when I couldn’t show up for myself.But inside, I felt like I was not feeling at all. Often on the inside, I felt up against the wall, with no way … [Read more...] about What High-Functioning (Concealed) Depression Really Looks Like
Is A Wintry Mix Descending Into My Front Yard?
The weather forecast indicated there could be a wintry mix today. My front yard is proof that they were correct. Sitting on the front porch this morning, I could hear tree limbs snapping and falling under the weight of the ice on their branches. At 6 AM, thunder and lightning reverberated, creating the perfect opportunity to get up and make a pot of coffee. Had we not … [Read more...] about Is A Wintry Mix Descending Into My Front Yard?
Can I Really Beat My Depression?
Photo by kevin Baquerizo on Unsplash My personal history aside, I feel my gut saying the outcome is at best 50-50. There have been times in my life where depression has been the driving force. And yet there have been years where depression was missing. And I spent most of my life denying that my having depression was even a possibility. I knew there were times where … [Read more...] about Can I Really Beat My Depression?
Summers Here, So Where Is My Depression?
Photo by David Vives on Unsplash I’m still stuck on being alone for the summer, with my depression on vacation. After being so determined to get my depression out in the open, why am I sad that it has taken a holiday? I should be doing back flips and alerting the media. Depression’s absence should be a celebration. I have been working on this for 5 years. And yet, I … [Read more...] about Summers Here, So Where Is My Depression?
