After my days on 5 East, I was certain depression would not be in charge of my attitude ever again. Well, that feeling came to me months after my 4 days there. Being alone with the staff, I was still very much up against the wall, and the fact that I had finally taken a different action and gotten a different response was still sinking in. Leading a balanced life with … [Read more...] about My Attitude Is Being Controlled By Depression
Self Care
I Don’t Have Time for This
It’s called a day off for a reason. However, for me, it is a race to get everything done in the 15 hours I will be awake. I focus on the day part, a day without going to work. But I completely ignore the OFF part. I have already been up an hour and 10 minutes. And I have: Checked my email from work (even though I am off)Took my medication, washed my face, and did other … [Read more...] about I Don’t Have Time for This
Is My Depression Keeping Me from The Finish Line?
Or as I am surmising, there is no finish line. But for certain activities, or events, there is a conclusion. Then why is it I feel as if it is never ending, and I am always one step from completing the challenge? Days turn into nights. The day ends and the night begins. This is very basic stuff. So why am I having trouble visualizing me crossing the finish line for my own … [Read more...] about Is My Depression Keeping Me from The Finish Line?
Now Back at The Gym, I Used Covid Instead of Depression for Why I Left
Depression told me it was an innocent slip, but I’m sure it was Freudian. I was sitting in the small office of my gym, re-registering. We were talking about getting back and without being asked, I volunteered that I had stopped because of Covid. This was true in a way, but it was not the real reason I stopped going. I stopped going to the gym because I had been in 5 East … [Read more...] about Now Back at The Gym, I Used Covid Instead of Depression for Why I Left
My Depression Let Me Buy a New Computer
It’s been months since I’ve been able to work from the front porch. I know it’s my fault for not making the decision sooner. After all, my old laptop has been non-responsive for months. Yet every time I would start to research new laptops, I would hear a voice in my head. And it would remind me that I still have a PC in my home office that I can use. So why am I thinking … [Read more...] about My Depression Let Me Buy a New Computer