My Concealed Depression

My thoughts on my lifetime of Major Depressive Disorder with suicidal ideation.

SMART - Self Management And Recovery Training

The World Looks Easier at 20,000 Feet

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The big picture. That’s what I see from row 6, seat C of the airplane. Almost immediately after takeoff, my perspective changed. At first, I was seeing Buck Mountain Road that I had just traveled to get to the airport. Then the city passed under us, getting visibly smaller as we climbed to our cruising altitude. Now I am wondering why I am writing in … [Read more...] about The World Looks Easier at 20,000 Feet

Why am I packing this for my trip?

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My flight leaves at 1 PM today. It is almost 8;30 AM. I am usually packed the night before, ready to go. But my clean laundry is still in the laundry room. I did get my suitcase out of the closet yesterday and put my shaving kit on top of the suitcase. They are both sitting on the floor of my bedroom. As I pack, I keep the suitcase closed, because we have a cat that … [Read more...] about Why am I packing this for my trip?

First time on a plane

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Ok, so it’s the first time I will have flown since being in the hospital for depression. I am an avid adventurer and have been flying for over 50 years. I remember when people smoked on a plane. I remember pre 9/11 security and when we called flight attendants “stewardesses.†Giving up control to the pilot and crew has … [Read more...] about First time on a plane

101 ideal activities for my new life with depression

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As I make progress and hash out some of the underlying issues that have caused my depression to intensify at different times in my life, I am beginning to see the value of visualizing my new future. I asked for professional medical attention 5 months ago because I have lost my focus. I could NOT see any way forward. I was up against the wall and could not see the … [Read more...] about 101 ideal activities for my new life with depression