• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
  • Home
  • About
  • Mental Health Resources
    • Depression Resources
  • Blog
    • Coping
    • Medication
    • Self Care
    • Stress and Anxiety
    • Unhelpful thinking
      • Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda
      • Fortune-Telling
      • Guilt and Shame
      • Time Travel
    • Sleep Issues
    • Depression
    • Covid19
    • Suicide & Self-Harm
    • Wellness Tools
      • SMART – Self Management And Recovery Training
      • WRAP (Wellness Recovery Action Plan)
      • Change Triangle
  • Contact
  • SHOP

Turnaround
You are here: Home / Featured Home / Why am I packing this for my trip?

Why am I packing this for my trip?

September 20, 2019 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Packing my troubles is one way depression stays with me
Packing my troubles is one way depression stays with me

My flight leaves at 1 PM today.

It is almost 8;30 AM. I am usually packed the night before, ready to go.

But my clean laundry is still in the laundry room. I did get my suitcase out of the closet yesterday and put my shaving kit on top of the suitcase. They are both sitting on the floor of my bedroom.

As I pack, I keep the suitcase closed, because we have a cat that enjoys sleeping on anything new, such as clean clothes you have just packed. As the suitcase is still empty and standing upright in the bedroom, our cat has not been able to leave his mark.

Packing my clothes, medication, and laptop will be easy.

Once I start, my years of experience will kick in and I will count out the right number of socks, shirts, etc. for the trip. I will pack my toothbrush, toothpaste and other toiletries. And I will pack a book to read on the plane. No problem.

So why am I packing yesterdays work experience into my suitcase?

It wasn’t the best of days. Although I am vey good at my job, I am still learning how things are done at my latest location. There is a learning curve and I am not usually the one on the underside of the curve. But I certainly was yesterday.

And now I am packing up all my thoughts about yesterday and I am trying to load them into my carry-on bag.

I am so mad at myself right now. I decided to attend the SMART conference months ago. As soon as I learned about it, I was on board. The chance to hear from experts in the field of recovery was for me, a chance to see my future, to see the possibilities for my life going forward.

My long-term goal now is to be a peer advocate. To take the training, to learn all I can, so I can help others who find themselves “up against he wall.” After 43 years of concealing my depression, of not facing it, not even wanting to know what was happening when I was depressed, I am finally facing it, calling it out, keeping it in the open where I can see it.

Packing my frustration about yesterday into my luggage for the conference seems to be the work of depression and unhelpful thinking.

Why would I force myself to wallow in yesterday when I have been looking forward to this weekend for months? I went to work yesterday with a positive attitude, wanting to make sure loose ends were tied up before I left to fly to Chicago. So why am I dragging this with me?

As the coffee kicks in, I am going to get my clean clothes out of the laundry room and pack my suitcase.

I will reexamine why I want to pack yesterday into my luggage. I do not need it; it will not help me get the most out of my experience and it just doesn’t fit well inside my carry-on bag. This means I will give myself permission to leave it behind, to not pack it.

If I need to look at this issue again, you can bet I will know where to find it when I return home. But for now, I am going to live in the present, do the things I need to do to be at the gate in plenty of time, and make the most of this marvelous opportunity

What do you pack in your mind for a trip?

Filed Under: Featured Home, SMART - Self Management And Recovery Training, Unhelpful thinking Tagged With: concealed depression, depression, luggage, SMART, SMART Recovery, unhealthy thinking styles, Unhelpful thinking, unhelpful thinking styles

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Primary Sidebar

I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder. As I meet others with mental illness, they often tell me they feel alone.

With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to let others know you are not alone. Others are going through the same things.

And I write to share what I am learning so you and I can lead a balanced life.

https://myconcealeddepression.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/my-concealed-depression-intro.mp4
  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Pinterest

More to See

The startling truth about coping statements for anxiety and depression

The Startling Truth About Coping Statements For Anxiety and Depression

October 28, 2020 By Depression Is Not My Boss

My 101 Coping Strategies for Anxiety

My 101 Best Coping Statements For Anxiety and Depression

October 18, 2020 By Depression Is Not My Boss

I write to understand my depression and thereby lead a balanced life.

Is Being Too Busy to Write a Good Thing?

September 2, 2023 By Depression Is Not My Boss

Even as I have MDD or concealed depression, I am wondering what makes me the happiest

What Would Make Me the Happiest?

August 14, 2023 By Depression Is Not My Boss

Are You Getting Enough Sleep?

You Never Pay More, Yet Clicking These Links And Making a Purchase Helps Fund My Blog

PureFormulas.com-Pure Healthy Goodness, Highest-Grade Natural Supplements! Fast, Free Shipping!
Mosaic 250x250
Blog Meets Brand
Best Self Improvement & Personal Development Blogs - OnToplist.com
RSS Search

Blog posts that go back to my 5 East time over 4 years ago

  • September 2023
  • August 2023
  • July 2023
  • June 2023
  • May 2023
  • April 2023
  • March 2023
  • February 2023
  • January 2023
  • December 2022
  • November 2022
  • October 2022
  • September 2022
  • July 2022
  • June 2022
  • May 2022
  • April 2022
  • March 2022
  • February 2022
  • January 2022
  • December 2021
  • November 2021
  • October 2021
  • September 2021
  • August 2021
  • July 2021
  • June 2021
  • April 2021
  • March 2021
  • February 2021
  • January 2021
  • December 2020
  • November 2020
  • October 2020
  • September 2020
  • August 2020
  • July 2020
  • June 2020
  • May 2020
  • April 2020
  • March 2020
  • February 2020
  • January 2020
  • December 2019
  • November 2019
  • October 2019
  • September 2019
  • August 2019
  • July 2019
  • June 2019
  • May 2019
  • April 2019

Footer

Contact

Email:  my.concealed.depression@gmail.com

Privacy Policy

Recent

  • September marks #SuicidePreventionMonth
  • Is Being Too Busy to Write a Good Thing?
  • What Would Make Me the Happiest?
  • I’m Still Pushing That Rock Up the Same Hill
  • My Depression Has Me Falling in and Out of Love

Search

Products

  • The Six Second Cover Letter™ $19.99
  • 10 Page Gratitude Coloring Pages $14.99
  • 5 gratitude coloring pages from my concealed depression to help reduce anxiety and depression Five - Gratitude Coloring Pages $9.99
  • The One Secret That Lands Your Dream Job[Course]
  • Write This Down, You'll Need It Later[Amazon]

© Copyright 2020 · My Concealed Depression · All Rights Reserved · Designed by The Marketing Momma