Depression is happiest when I am keeping secrets. It loves when I sneak around and don’t share what it is telling me. All those crazy plan’s depression has suggested to me over the years involve me keeping them hidden from others. This has included major issues relating to my job. And many minor issues like canceling our back up internet service at the house without … [Read more...] about I Have Fewer Secrets Taking Wellbutrin – Doing the Drugs Part V
depression treatment
Everybody Expects Something of Me, Even the Birds
If I sit on the porch in the morning and don’t put the bird feeders out right away, the birds land on the empty frame and stare at me, waiting to be fed. Now I understand that I am projecting emotions for them when I tell you they are looking at me and saying, “put the feeders out already.” The birds have been coming to these feeders for four years. They know I bring them in … [Read more...] about Everybody Expects Something of Me, Even the Birds
Recent Raccoons and My Depression
I know my depression recovery is not a straight line. And, in the animal kingdom, some species are more active at certain times of the year. This includes raccoons that I see now on my nightly commute home. Having traveled the same back roads for almost a year, there are certain spots where I expect to see wildlife. Over the winter, I saw way more foxes than I am seeing now. … [Read more...] about Recent Raccoons and My Depression
Why Am I Afraid to Be Me?
Most days, I must explain to you why I am allowing myself some self-care time. For some reason, I don’t feel like I deserve to have “me time.” I grew up without learning how to look out for myself first. Now that may seem off-base to those closest to me. I have set goals, achieved results and always been the go-to person. And many of my projects were thought of and … [Read more...] about Why Am I Afraid to Be Me?
Losing My Pandemic Pounds is Not Easy
For several weeks now, my scale has hovered around 198 lbs. This is 14 lb. above my February weight, and 20+ pounds above my ideal weight. I tell myself that I will easily lose weight when I focus on this. But that has not gotten the pounds off. In fact, several weeks ago I was weighing in at 194.4 lbs. So my weight is only climbing, not receding. I can feel the extra … [Read more...] about Losing My Pandemic Pounds is Not Easy