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“I Suffer From Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning.

Turnaround

depressionisreal

Will Depression Let Me Make Money?

May 23, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Will my depression let me make money or am I selling out if I earn a living while writing about my depression?

As I approach five hundred blog posts over the past 3 years, I am thinking about the future. When I started writing, it was therapy. And it still is. There are many issues that I face living with depression. Many of these are subtle and have taken me time to identify. And then I mull them over, write about them, and then mull over those thoughts. And then I often write more … [Read more...] about Will Depression Let Me Make Money?

Is There Just Too Much Going On?

January 18, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

I feel so stressed but was trying to conceal it so people wouldn't see depresion was sharing unhelpful thinking

Last night one of my employees said I looked stressed. I certainly wasn't trying to project feeling that way. However, the look on my face must have given away what I have been trying to hide. Like my concealed depression, I have not shared my feelings at work. Well, almost never. And I was less than excited about the one or two times I attempted it. Sharing at work not … [Read more...] about Is There Just Too Much Going On?

Why Am I Anxious About Being Anxious?

January 13, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

I am anxious about my anxiety

It’s like a huge weight I am dragging around. If I don’t think about it, it’s still there. But if I start thinking about it, the weight just intensifies. Much of my frustration about the morning is centered around the painfully slow response of my laptop. It has taken me over 10 minutes to pen these few sentences. Should I purchase a new laptop or continue to seek out … [Read more...] about Why Am I Anxious About Being Anxious?

My Trying LED Light Therapy Is Making Depression Mad

December 27, 2021 by Depression Is Not My Boss 2 Comments

Why is depression mad that I am trying light therapy to reduce the winter blues?

My psychiatrist mentioned light therapy for SAD during my last medication management session. This year I realized back in early November that the days were getting markedly shorter. By 5 PM, if it was overcast outside, the sky was almost black. And the days just before Winter solstice, the shortest day of the year, seemed exceedingly devoid of light. Now we are 6 days on … [Read more...] about My Trying LED Light Therapy Is Making Depression Mad

My Psychiatrist Asked Me, “When Is Enough, Enough”?

September 28, 2021 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

My psychiatris asked me, when is enough, enough?

Last night I had a virtual therapy appointment. I remember my therapist had asked a question and I was responding. It was my side of the story I was relating. Not just the facts or my feelings about it, but I was defending my actions. My decision and why I made it was a source of pride I suppose. My therapist stopped me and said, “I hear rationalization.” He had caught … [Read more...] about My Psychiatrist Asked Me, “When Is Enough, Enough”?

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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