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“I Suffer From Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning.

End Child Anxiety

Frank King

Stigma Has Kept Me From “Coming Out” With My Depression

July 10, 2022 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

If I wasn't afraid of stigma, I would send this email about my depression with my full name

If I weren't still dragging around the fear of what they might say, I would openly use my 500th blog post to email this letter to my friends and family. Dear Friend, I suffer from depression. (1) My life with depression started before I was 19, and depression has been a factor in most of my life’s decisions, both small and large. I do not say this to excuse my … [Read more...] about Stigma Has Kept Me From “Coming Out” With My Depression

Today I Am Putting My Depression in Perspective

August 10, 2021 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Today I am Putting My Depression In Perspective, Avoiding Negative Self Talk

I just want a day off from pushing the rock up the hill. Is that too much to ask? Day after day after day I wake up and stare at the same freaky rock. Some days, I admit, that rock looks like a huge boulder and the hill look like a vertical wall of solid granite. These are my “half-dome” days, when the hill looks to me like Half Dome at Yosemite National Park in … [Read more...] about Today I Am Putting My Depression in Perspective

“Those Thoughts,” Are They My Suicidal Ideation?

June 9, 2020 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

My depression includes suicidal ideation

I have been afraid to write about this subject. While people who have suicidal ideation will get it, the vast majority of people do not understand this or are afraid to talk about it. For 43+ years, I was afraid of getting anywhere near the subject. It turns out, I have a major depressive disorder, with suicidal ideation. My suicidal thoughts are not an everyday … [Read more...] about “Those Thoughts,” Are They My Suicidal Ideation?

Super Focused, Then Super Distrac… Oh Look, a Squirrel

June 6, 2020 by Depression Is Not My Boss 1 Comment

MDD has me scattered, I cannot focus

My mind is all over the place lately. Now I know there is a lot going on, but that is no excuse. OK, so a year ago I was in the hospital being treated for MDD, major depressive disorder. Then I came out of retirement and went back to work in management. Then, the pandemic happened and all sorts of customs (social distancing) and costumes (masks) have become the new … [Read more...] about Super Focused, Then Super Distrac… Oh Look, a Squirrel

Every Day I Push the Same Rock Up the Same Hill

June 5, 2020 by Depression Is Not My Boss 2 Comments

major depressive disorder has me pushing the same boulder up the same hill every day.

Some days it is a pebble and the hill is hardly noticeable. Other days, it is a boulder and the hill is more of a mountain, that ascends almost vertically from the valley floor. During these days, my depression is everything. Concealing it and acting to the world like nothing is wrong takes all my energy. And I mean every single ounce of energy I can muster to keep people … [Read more...] about Every Day I Push the Same Rock Up the Same Hill

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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  • I Feel So Guilty for Not Doing More Today
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  • I’m Gaining Weight – Can I Blame My Depression?
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