Depression is happiest when I am keeping secrets. It loves when I sneak around and don’t share what it is telling me. All those crazy plan’s depression has suggested to me over the years involve me keeping them hidden from others. This has included major issues relating to my job. And many minor issues like canceling our back up internet service at the house without … [Read more...] about I Have Fewer Secrets Taking Wellbutrin – Doing the Drugs Part V
My new life with depression is all about progress, not perfection. Knowing where depression is and what it is up to is very important to me. Keeping it out in the open is my main strategy. Not letting it have me keep secrets is a big thing. Historically, depression has put something in my mind, and then swore me to secrecy. Not fact-checking what depression was telling … [Read more...] about Who is running this show?
Since I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder, I have learned just how secretive depression is. And I have learned many of the sneaky trick’s depression has used with me over the past 43+ years as it kept a hold over me. The craziest part about my relationship with depression is that it always makes me feel like I am in control. Worse, the ideas are planted by … [Read more...] about Depression Wants Me to Keep Secrets Again
How can I stay out of the depths of despair? How can I recognize what’s going on in my head before I become obsessed with one idea, one thought, one depression guided way of thinking? I think the first thing is to acknowledge that I have depression. “But it doesn’t have me.” I am doing that every day. I am learning everything I can about how it works and how it has gotten me … [Read more...] about How will I know depression is coming again?
Depression is not my Boss – Day 1 This morning I videotaped my thoughts about beginning this new journey. I look pretty rough in the video, but it is me, this morning. And as I write this, I am already having to deal with depression. As I face my life and what’s next, my first thoughts were “I am all alone and I must figure this out by myself.” This makes me feel afraid. Then … [Read more...] about Depression Is Not My Boss