My Concealed Depression

My thoughts on my lifetime of Major Depressive Disorder with suicidal ideation.

unhealthy thinking styles

Is It Working Yet? – Doing the Drugs Part IV

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It has only been five days. And I just took day five’s medication about 30 minutes ago. I understand that it can be four weeks before my Wellbutrin XL, 150 mg. is doing its job as intended. And I am still taking a smaller portion of my Prozac (now 20mg) to help as I transition. So why am I expecting a miracle? Why would my experience with changing … [Read more...] about Is It Working Yet? – Doing the Drugs Part IV

I’m Overcast This Morning With a 50% Chance of Showers

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It is not a gloomy morning. And it is markedly cooler than yesterday, which is not a bad thing. There was enough rain last night that I only needed to water the three pots of petunias on the back-deck railing. Being the smallest pots, they require the most attention on hot days. As you know, we live with bears. This means I bring in the bird feeders every night, … [Read more...] about I’m Overcast This Morning With a 50% Chance of Showers

“Those Thoughts,” Are They My Suicidal Ideation?

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I have been afraid to write about this subject. While people who have suicidal ideation will get it, the vast majority of people do not understand this or are afraid to talk about it. For 43+ years, I was afraid of getting anywhere near the subject. It turns out, I have a major depressive disorder, with suicidal ideation. My suicidal thoughts are not an everyday … [Read more...] about “Those Thoughts,” Are They My Suicidal Ideation?