I want to decide, but I feel frozen instead. There are things I can do right now that would address getting out of bed in the morning. But somehow, all I can muster is my “being OK†act. My high-functioning depression kicks in when I must get out of bed. This morning is a perfect example. I had gone to bed just before 10 PM. Eight hours … [Read more...] about Depression Has Left Me a “Deer in Headlights” Again
Depression Was Happy That I Was Neglecting Self-Care
I just thought I was overly busy. But then, I noticed that each day was clipping along, and I was becoming a spectator. No longer was I seizing the moment, setting aside time for me, or even thinking about tomorrow. Events were driving me. Then I spoke with my therapist. “If you don’t put your own oxygen mask on first, how can you … [Read more...] about Depression Was Happy That I Was Neglecting Self-Care
Why Am I Exceeding the Speed Limit?
Over the past few weeks, I have not been able to slow down. As the days get shorter, I am almost frantic to get things accomplished. And the thought of self-care, of "me" time, makes me cringe. There is no way I can be available for me, there is too much to do. So now I am recognizing this as a clear sign I need to slow down. But knowing is different from doing. In … [Read more...] about Why Am I Exceeding the Speed Limit?
Evergreen – Lessons I’ve Learned From 50 Years of High-Functioning Depression
It's been almost 2 1/2 years since I checked in to 5 East. What I have learned since then has changed my life in ways I could never have imagined. The morning I went to the ER, I was so tightly up against the wall that I could not see anything except the abyss. At that moment, I was way past circling the drain. And as I have recounted many times, that morning I saw only … [Read more...] about Evergreen – Lessons I’ve Learned From 50 Years of High-Functioning Depression
Today I Am Thankful for Being Alive
It has been a wonderful two weeks. I spent time with my family and recharged my batteries. Having a week to bond with my grandson is something I am so very thankful for. The pandemic has limited our time together. However, since June, I have seen him on three occasions. Each visit was a few days to a week. I feel so blessed to get to spend time in person with him. Of … [Read more...] about Today I Am Thankful for Being Alive
