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Mental Health

It’s A New Year; Am I Ready?

January 1, 2025 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Unsplash2025 has got to be better than 2024Last year, I lost my Mother, and my wife lost her father. Even though both were in their 90s, the finality of it is still hard to comprehend. And my adult children lost the two grandparents that they had grown up with.The full year was just a mess.Even knowing my mother was 96, going on 97 was no conciliation. In the last weeks of … [Read more...] about It’s A New Year; Am I Ready?

My Depression Says The Holidays Are Here, So Why Am I Not Happier?

December 23, 2024 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Roxana Zerni UNSPLASHMy depression is glad that I am sad and not happier.It gets to think that it is doing its job. Sewing seeds of doubt in myself and my actions is a key part of its MO. Once my depression gets me second-guessing myself, the journey down the rabbit hole has begun. This will lead to me being up against the wall with no discernable way forward.And it doesn’t … [Read more...] about My Depression Says The Holidays Are Here, So Why Am I Not Happier?

What Makes Me Choose to Live with Depression?

December 17, 2024 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Photo by Marten Bjork on UnsplashChoosing not to live with depression is, for me, choosing suicide.Because of my family history, I see that I either learn to face depression and live with it, or check out. And my one instance of contemplating checking out occurred almost 50 years ago. Since then, I have understood that I am more afraid of death than I am of living with … [Read more...] about What Makes Me Choose to Live with Depression?

What Do I Want?

December 16, 2024 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Photo by Vadim Bogulov on UnsplashIs it something I can share, or is it more esoteric?Will I write about it or spend a page or more avoiding talking about "what do I want?" Sometimes I need to warm up my brain before I can open up about what I actually decided to write about. Ok, it’s most of the time. I almost always seem to ramble on about something, pulling out details in an … [Read more...] about What Do I Want?

There’s a Lot Going On, So Is Being OK, OK?

November 20, 2024 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Unsplash I am amazed at the changes the last month has brought.A month ago, I had just returned from trekking in the Grand Canyon. Things were better than OK, the family was great, and I had just booked a flight up north for Thanksgiving. Work was good, and I was getting to use the wood stove some mornings to take the chill out of the living room.And then stuff hit the … [Read more...] about There’s a Lot Going On, So Is Being OK, OK?

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Joel Natl Career Fair Bio Pic he's using for my concealed depressionHello, I am Joel Quas 

In April 2019, I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder with suicidal ideation. By writing things out, I am learning more about my relationship with depression. 

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