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“I Suffer From Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning.

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You are here: Home / Self Care / Now I Can Practise Self-care Without Feeling Guilty

Now I Can Practise Self-care Without Feeling Guilty

August 16, 2020 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

It is Sunday morning, and time for self-care.

The sky is overcast, and the air is damp. It is almost chilly this morning.  This is a far cry from the past month, where daily temperatures have been in the 90’s and the heat index has topped 100 degrees. Drought conditions where beginning to show themselves. Everything was turning brown and crisp.

Even our lake had dropped over six feet, leaving the dock high and dry.

Sitting on the front porch with my coffee, birds are enjoying the feeders. I got them out early this morning. If I am on the porch and have not hung the feeders, cardinals will sit on the empty post, looking in my direction and calling to me. The birds become focused on breakfast once the feeders are in place.

READ: Everyone expects something from me, even the birds

My plans for today include some outside time.

The past five days at work have included additional hours for a variety of reasons. Arriving home at 2 AM, the morning comes very quickly. And if I sleep in a bit, there is less time for home projects before I must shower and shave and leave for work. Not complaining, I hope, just stating facts.

Getting in the garden is high on my self-care list.

Weeding is soothing and satisfying. Plus, even with overcast skies, I am getting exposure to sunlight. Working indoors, there is no sunlight. Once I weed, I know there are tomatoes, peppers, and cucumbers to harvest. Collecting them in a colander caps off my time in the garden.

Later, I am looking forward to board games with the family.

This is a wonderful way to self-care for me. I bend the edges of self-care and include what makes me happy. My definition of self-care may be looser than some, but it works for me. A year ago, I couldn’t even think about self-care. I felt it was selfish and all about me. It turns out that’s exactly what it is.

The difference now is that I look forward to self-care.

READ: Self-Care Let’s Me Not Give A Darn About Others

A year ago, I felt guilty about even considering it. As I learn more about what I need to live a balanced life with depression, there is much less guilt. Things I had done in the past, I never realized were self-care. And there was never any guilt about doing them. The guilt about doing things for myself comes along, too, when my depression takes over

So, this morning, I am not going to feel guilty about stopping here and heading to the garden.

My concealed depression is written under the alias “Depression is not my boss.” I have certifications in SMART Recovery and am a Global Career Development Facilitator.

Diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder last year, I am sharing what I learn.

 If you know someone who might benefit from reading this, please share. 

I very much appreciate your comments. I learn from them and respond to everyone.

Filed Under: Featured Home, Self Care, Some days I feel like myself, Unhelpful thinking, What depression has cost me Tagged With: Birds, depression, depression and anxiety, depressionisreal, feeling guilty, guilt, self care, Self-care, Sunday

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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