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“I Suffer From Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning.

End Child Anxiety

Facts and myths about mental illness

Why Must My Depression Decide What I Really Want or Need?

March 13, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Depression can keep me from my wellness recovery action plan and other tools like the change triangle

Photo by Alvaro Reyes on Unsplash If I think I want or need something, shouldn’t that be enough? Yet here I am negotiating with myself over what I want. Even after a lifetime of making my own choices, I am stuck between my ideas and depression. Now it is possible that my depression has allowed me a few “wins.” You know, just enough to keep me in the game. My … [Read more...] about Why Must My Depression Decide What I Really Want or Need?

What I Have Learned About My Depression

March 10, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Depression will be with me forever, so what have I learned about depression?

Photo by Pawel Czerwinski on Unsplash I want to say that I have figured it out and have all of the answers. If I could say, “I understand what and why,” that would be amazing. And by saying that, I would be saying that my depression will never appear again. In the past, my trips to the abyss have been lengthy and very brutal. So I want to never, ever again, circle the … [Read more...] about What I Have Learned About My Depression

Was Reducing My Wellbutrin a Good Idea? – Part 2

March 9, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Wellbutrin medication I am changing doses from 450 mg. to 300 mg

The afterglow of having family at our home has faded, along with the strength of my Wellbutrin. It was me that brought up reducing my daily dosage when I last met with my psychiatrist. I cited how warm and lighter the winter had been so far and that I had not needed to get out my daylight box. Plus, having gone to Africa, the winter had been broken into pre and post-trek to … [Read more...] about Was Reducing My Wellbutrin a Good Idea? – Part 2

I Learned Something About Working with Others Today

March 8, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

I learned that I try to control people and it is not depression that is doing this

Photo by Sivani Bandaru on Unsplash It appears that I am very bad at it. I would like to think that I have a knack for working with others and inspiring them to do their absolute best. And often this is true. Most of the managers, supervisors, and employees that report to me seem to get my ideas and execute them. Perhaps it’s because I treat them the way I would want to … [Read more...] about I Learned Something About Working with Others Today

Was it Depression’s Fault I Did Not Meet My New Therapist Last Night?

March 7, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Did depression keep me from my therapist appointment?

It wasn’t that I didn’t have an appointment. And it wasn’t for inattention on my part. Or at least it felt that way to me. I called my employer's Care network. And I answered all their questions. They wanted to know if I preferred a male or a female therapist. I explained that I have worked with both. All I want is someone who I can talk with and possibly connect … [Read more...] about Was it Depression’s Fault I Did Not Meet My New Therapist Last Night?

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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  • I Feel So Guilty for Not Doing More Today
  • I Took a Self-Care Day and I Don’t Feel Guilty
  • I’m Gaining Weight – Can I Blame My Depression?
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  • Why Am I Having Trouble Getting Out of Bed Again?

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