My Concealed Depression

My thoughts on my lifetime of Major Depressive Disorder with suicidal ideation.

concealed depression

Is it possible to be “recovered” rather than forever in “recovery?”

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This is the question I am grappling with right now. This idea was presented in the training I am doing with SMART Recovery. Yes, I want to be a meeting facilitator someday, but right now I am still working on me. Seeing this concept in black and white, has given me a renewed sense of hope about my future. The Transtheoretical Model (also called the Stages of Change … [Read more...] about Is it possible to be “recovered” rather than forever in “recovery?”

What is my motivation?

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If I were an actor in a play, I would be asking the director that question. Seriously, I am not sure why I am doing the things I am doing. That being said, some things are clear. I travel to my day job because they have fantastic health benefits. This is worth the time and trouble of the long commute. I eat, and bath, do my laundry and make a fire in the woodstove to … [Read more...] about What is my motivation?

I can’t believe I’m getting out of bed when the alarm clock rings

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Ok, so I’m not jumping out of bed yet. But after the past six months of often resisting getting out from under the covers, this is real progress. I mean, “alert the media” kind of stuff. The crazy (can I use that word?) part about this is I did not know for a while that I had plateaued. It’s a whole lot easier to see that from the outside looking in. You’ll recall … [Read more...] about I can’t believe I’m getting out of bed when the alarm clock rings