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“I Suffer From Depression.” Here’s What I Am Learning.

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depression

I Feel That I Am Missing Something Important

March 14, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Am I missing something about my medication that keeps me from waking up in the morning?

Photo by Pierre Bamin on Unsplash Is it just the time of year, or am I beginning to descend into a depression cycle? Can I just push through this or do I need additional resources? I know that every day is different, and I should not expect rainbows and unicorns each day. Besides, where would I keep all the unicorns? I only have 5 acres of property. Of course, this would … [Read more...] about I Feel That I Am Missing Something Important

Why Must My Depression Decide What I Really Want or Need?

March 13, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Depression can keep me from my wellness recovery action plan and other tools like the change triangle

Photo by Alvaro Reyes on Unsplash If I think I want or need something, shouldn’t that be enough? Yet here I am negotiating with myself over what I want. Even after a lifetime of making my own choices, I am stuck between my ideas and depression. Now it is possible that my depression has allowed me a few “wins.” You know, just enough to keep me in the game. My … [Read more...] about Why Must My Depression Decide What I Really Want or Need?

I Learned Something About Working with Others Today

March 8, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

I learned that I try to control people and it is not depression that is doing this

Photo by Sivani Bandaru on Unsplash It appears that I am very bad at it. I would like to think that I have a knack for working with others and inspiring them to do their absolute best. And often this is true. Most of the managers, supervisors, and employees that report to me seem to get my ideas and execute them. Perhaps it’s because I treat them the way I would want to … [Read more...] about I Learned Something About Working with Others Today

Was it Depression’s Fault I Did Not Meet My New Therapist Last Night?

March 7, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Did depression keep me from my therapist appointment?

It wasn’t that I didn’t have an appointment. And it wasn’t for inattention on my part. Or at least it felt that way to me. I called my employer's Care network. And I answered all their questions. They wanted to know if I preferred a male or a female therapist. I explained that I have worked with both. All I want is someone who I can talk with and possibly connect … [Read more...] about Was it Depression’s Fault I Did Not Meet My New Therapist Last Night?

My Depression is Waiting for Me to Say, “I Give Up”

March 3, 2023 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Depression is trying to have me give up

Photo by Hasnain Babar on Unsplash My depression can only push me so far or it will lose its host. After all, if I die, then depression dies too. So it is in depression’s best interest to keep me alive and kicking. Even when it has me in the abyss, its focus is on keeping me up against that wall. If I cannot feel anything or envision any way forward, depression is … [Read more...] about My Depression is Waiting for Me to Say, “I Give Up”

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I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder.  I am genuinely determined to figure out my personal relationship with depression. With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to find answers. 

I once got so carried away searching for answers that I even earned a  certification in  SMART Recovery. 

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Recent

  • I Feel So Guilty for Not Doing More Today
  • I Took a Self-Care Day and I Don’t Feel Guilty
  • I’m Gaining Weight – Can I Blame My Depression?
  • My Depression Has Me Catastrophizing Instead of Fixing My Sleep Problem
  • Why Am I Having Trouble Getting Out of Bed Again?

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