• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
  • Home
  • About
  • Mental Health Resources
    • Depression Resources
  • Blog
    • Coping
    • Medication
    • Self Care
    • Stress and Anxiety
    • Unhelpful thinking
      • Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda
      • Fortune-Telling
      • Guilt and Shame
      • Time Travel
    • Sleep Issues
    • Depression
    • Covid19
    • Suicide & Self-Harm
    • Wellness Tools
      • SMART – Self Management And Recovery Training
      • WRAP (Wellness Recovery Action Plan)
      • Change Triangle
  • Contact
  • SHOP

Turnaround
You are here: Home / Featured Home / These Flies Won’t Quit Pestering Me This Morning – Are They Triggers?

These Flies Won’t Quit Pestering Me This Morning – Are They Triggers?

July 14, 2020 by Depression Is Not My Boss Leave a Comment

Are these house flies depression triggers for me?

My depression and unhelpful thinking is much more subtle than house flies.

I’m sitting on the porch, enjoying my first cup of coffee. Then I notice something tickling my leg. Just below my knee is a house fly. It looks up at me with all its eyes as if to say “what?” Then I sweep my hand down near it and if flies off.

Before I can grab my coffee cup, another has landed on the same leg, down by my ankle.

Instinctively, I reached down with my hand to brush it away. Now there is a fly buzzing around my face. His cousin is going after my other leg. This swatting and rushing lasts until my coffee is cool enough to drink without having to take just a sip for fear of burning my mouth.

My depression can be doggedly persistent in the same annoying way.

Unhelpful thinking can pop up at a moments notice. And I find myself brushing it aside almost instinctively. This is such a change from a year ago when I did not even understand what unhelpful thinking styles were. Learning about unhelpful thinking, then acting on the new information has been one of the cornerstones of my recovery.

Filling out the “here’s what I look like when I am well” worksheet from WRAP has given me a tool to measure myself through.

The next worksheet I have lists possible triggers. One example is road rage, which I kindly listed as traffic. But it is way stronger than just traffic. And it can set me off, creating frustration and anger where none existed. Having made a conscious decision not to get upset by New Jersey drivers some years ago, it surprised me that I had reverted to being angry.

Passing what I perceived as a slowpoke on a moonless night, on a curve, at over 80 mph, I saw oncoming lights.

Pulling back into my lane, I could feel unhelpful thinking all around me. I was almost shaking at my near miss. Why had I made the decision to pass there, on a curve? If I had really needed to pass, I travel the road enough to know that after the curve there is a long straightaway. This is a very safe spot to pass, even at night.

READ: I let the dump truck go – Road Rage Part II

But I had projected my anger at the truck in front of me and blamed him for my actions.

That driver, like the house flies pestering me this morning, are only doing what they can do.  Big rig trucks can only go so fast on curvy back roads. And flies buzz and land wherever they want to. I’ve lived with house flies for over 60 years. I know how they operate. When the air is still, they want to be on you.

Now that a slight breeze has begun, the flies are not as aggressive.

Depression triggers are a lot like these house flies. There are times when I cannot get away from them, and times when I do not see them at all. By taking a step back, I can look at these and see what’s really going on. I can do this without getting angry or frustrated.

Well, most of the time.

READ: Guess What I Wrote Down?

The flies are back again, landing on my ankles. A reasonable person would either continue to swat at them or just go inside. Wanting to enjoy the first part of my morning on the porch, I choose to not get impatient and angry at the flies. They are just being flies. And the breeze is becoming more consistent, keep the flies on the wing.

Although, on the top of my laptop, a fly is cleaning its multiple legs, while contemplating its next move.

I will not give in to the flies, but rather will go get my second cup of coffee and return to the porch. The cool morning promises to give way to a hot and humid afternoon. Enjoying the cool of the day, I am making a conscious decision not to let the flies get the best of me.

READ MORE: Recent Raccoons and My Depression

My concealed depression is written under the alias “Depression is not my boss.” I have certifications in SMART Recovery and am a Global Career Development Facilitator.

Diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder last year, I am sharing what I learn. If you know someone who might benefit from reading this, please share. 

I very much appreciate your comments.

Filed Under: Facts and myths about mental illness, Featured Home, Self Care, SMART - Self Management And Recovery Training, Unhelpful thinking, WRAP (Wellness Recovery Action Plan) Tagged With: concealed depression, depression, depression and anxiety, depression is not my boss, depression treatment, depressionisreal, High-functioning depression, house flies, Major Depressive Disorder, my concealed depression, triggers, unhealthy thinking styles, Unhelpful thinking, unhelpful thinking styles

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Primary Sidebar

I write My Concealed Depression to create Mental Health AwarenessHello, I am Joel. I have Major Depressive Disorder. As I meet others with mental illness, they often tell me they feel alone.

With 40+ years of living with concealed depression, I write my blog to let others know you are not alone. Others are going through the same things.

And I write to share what I am learning so you and I can lead a balanced life.

https://myconcealeddepression.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/my-concealed-depression-intro.mp4
  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Pinterest

More to See

The startling truth about coping statements for anxiety and depression

The Startling Truth About Coping Statements For Anxiety and Depression

October 28, 2020 By Depression Is Not My Boss

My 101 Coping Strategies for Anxiety

My 101 Best Coping Statements For Anxiety and Depression

October 18, 2020 By Depression Is Not My Boss

I write to understand my depression and thereby lead a balanced life.

Is Being Too Busy to Write a Good Thing?

September 2, 2023 By Depression Is Not My Boss

Even as I have MDD or concealed depression, I am wondering what makes me the happiest

What Would Make Me the Happiest?

August 14, 2023 By Depression Is Not My Boss

Are You Getting Enough Sleep?

You Never Pay More, Yet Clicking These Links And Making a Purchase Helps Fund My Blog

PureFormulas.com-Pure Healthy Goodness, Highest-Grade Natural Supplements! Fast, Free Shipping!
Mosaic 250x250
Blog Meets Brand
Best Self Improvement & Personal Development Blogs - OnToplist.com
RSS Search

Blog posts that go back to my 5 East time over 4 years ago

  • September 2023
  • August 2023
  • July 2023
  • June 2023
  • May 2023
  • April 2023
  • March 2023
  • February 2023
  • January 2023
  • December 2022
  • November 2022
  • October 2022
  • September 2022
  • July 2022
  • June 2022
  • May 2022
  • April 2022
  • March 2022
  • February 2022
  • January 2022
  • December 2021
  • November 2021
  • October 2021
  • September 2021
  • August 2021
  • July 2021
  • June 2021
  • April 2021
  • March 2021
  • February 2021
  • January 2021
  • December 2020
  • November 2020
  • October 2020
  • September 2020
  • August 2020
  • July 2020
  • June 2020
  • May 2020
  • April 2020
  • March 2020
  • February 2020
  • January 2020
  • December 2019
  • November 2019
  • October 2019
  • September 2019
  • August 2019
  • July 2019
  • June 2019
  • May 2019
  • April 2019

Footer

Contact

Email:  my.concealed.depression@gmail.com

Privacy Policy

Recent

  • September marks #SuicidePreventionMonth
  • Is Being Too Busy to Write a Good Thing?
  • What Would Make Me the Happiest?
  • I’m Still Pushing That Rock Up the Same Hill
  • My Depression Has Me Falling in and Out of Love

Search

Products

  • The Six Second Cover Letter™ $19.99
  • 10 Page Gratitude Coloring Pages $14.99
  • 5 gratitude coloring pages from my concealed depression to help reduce anxiety and depression Five - Gratitude Coloring Pages $9.99
  • The One Secret That Lands Your Dream Job[Course]
  • Write This Down, You'll Need It Later[Amazon]

© Copyright 2020 · My Concealed Depression · All Rights Reserved · Designed by The Marketing Momma